Activities to help with grieving for adults and children
When someone passes away, a complicated rush of feelings occurs that may be difficult to comprehend. If you are attempting to work through those complicated emotions, or are helping others—especially children—do so, consider some of the activities listed below, which allow one to express and understand the emotions that accompany grief.
Activities for adults
Journaling
Journaling during your grief experience can help you express your feelings and understand the importance of your loss. If you wish you could have told the person something before he/she died, consider writing a letter to the deceased person. Afterward, you can bury it, destroy it, keep it—whatever feels right to you.
Exercise
The mind and body are connected. Physical activity helps keep you healthy, and also prepares you to cope better emotionally. Ways to take care of one's physical health and combat stress and fatigue include getting plenty of sleep, eating healthy and exercising.
Spending time with nature can be soothing and healing. You can do any physical activity that you have enjoyed in the past, or try a new one. Finally, doing the activity with others can be even more helpful.
Meditation
We’ve written a complete guide on grieving and meditation, which you can check out here. But in short, meditation allows you to give space and time to your emotions, checking in on how you are really feeling. It takes practice, but eventually, letting yourself feel exactly as you feel can be the one of the most healthy experiences to have in the grieving process.
Rituals
Rituals are activities that are done to remember and honor the person whom you have lost. They can be related to your cultural traditions—like a visitation or wake, funeral, or memorial service—and there are also informal rituals that will honor the deceased and help you cope. Here are some:
Sewing a memory quilt
Planting a memory garden or plant
Sharing a memory dinner
Lighting candles on special dates
Creating a Mini-Memoir
Making a Memory Box, Sculptured Memory, or a Handprint
Weaving Memory Bracelets
A Support Group
The internet allows easy access to talk about your loss with other individuals who may be facing a similar type of situation. A support group is a way to engage in conversation, share with others what you’re feeling, and get a different perspective to cope.
Actively Moving Forward offers a variety of avenues for sharing and receiving help during your grief journey. With a text-messaging service called GriefCoach, they help your network to check in on hard days and offer emotional support.
What’s Your Grief offers e-courses, podcasts, and articles with face-to-face resources to help you move throsugh your journey and learn ways to support others in the future.
Grief In Common focuses on finding someone whom you can meet in person and offers phone consultations and live chat rooms.
HealGrief offers a program for young people, a Candle Gallery where you light a virtual candle, and other larger virtual memorial sites. The site also has an Artful Healing section that allows you to create art, photography, and stories to share with others during a season of loss.
Using Social Media
Memorial pages on social media sites have become popular ways to inform a wider audience about a loved one’s passing and a way to reach out for help. As well as allowing you to convey practical information, such as funeral plans, social media allows loved ones or friends to post tributes or condolences. Reading these messages can provide comfort for those grieving the loss. To gain protection from Internet trolls, you can create a closed group on Facebook and post privately on social media such as Instagram.
Reading
Many books have been written on coping with grief, some by authors who have undergone their own loss.
The loss of a parent can make you feel lonely about no longer having them in your life, as they hold a special relationship to you having brought you into the world. Here are some titles focused on this type of loss:
Knocking on Heaven’s Door by Katy Butler
Dear Darkness by Kevin Young
The Orphaned Adult by Alexander Levy
The loss of a spouse is especially difficult in that on top of losing your person, many grieve the loss of future plans they had made together and carry double the workload now that their partner is gone. If you have experienced the death of a partner, the following books may be helpful.
The Year of Magical Thinking by Joan Didion
A Grief Observed by C.S. Lewis
Bearing the Unbearable by Joanne Cacciatore
Please Be Patient, I’m Grieving by Gary Roe
The loss of a child is heartbreaking, and it is important to know that you are not alone. In addition to this guide on how to grieve, the following books may be helpful:
When the Bough Breaks by Judith R. Bernstein
A Bereaved Father by Steve Younis
Activities for children
Reading
There are also many children’s books on the market that help a child learn about grief, death, loss, and mourning. Allow them the freedom and flexibility to read whenever they feel they are ready to find out more about their grief. Give them the opportunity to ask questions, explore information, and settle their emotions.
Sesame Street Grief Storybook
Something Very Sad Happened: A Toddler’s Guide to Understanding Death by Bonnie Zucker
The Invisible String by Patrice Karst and Joanne Lew Vriethoff
The Goodbye Book by Todd Parr
I Miss You: A First Look at Death by Pat Thomas