Read these books to help you cope with aging gracefully

The concept of aging can be scary for some people, so much so that history is full of stories and myths about people who devote their lives to searching for the Fountain of Youth or a magical elixir for immortality. But what are we so afraid of? The stigmas and stereotypes around getting older have obstructed our understanding of what it truly means to age. If you or anyone you know are having trouble coping with aging, here are a list of books and authors who can help you find the good in the passing of time, even finding ways to rejoice in getting older. 

From Age-ing to Sage-ing by Zalman Schachter-Shalomi

This is an inspiring and informative guide on how to create an aging process that is full of adventure, passion, mystery, and fulfillment, rather than anxiety. The author shares his experiences of his spiritual quest for answers, which includes a vision quest in a secluded cabin with Sufi masters, Buddhist teachers, and Native American shamans, to give perspective on this topic. He also gives neurological and psychological research to offer techniques on how to “expand horizons beyond the narrow view of ‘the present’ into a grand and enduring eternity.”

The Gift of Years: Growing Older Gracefully by Joan Chittister

In this work, Sister Joan Chittister shows us how to not only accept, but also celebrate getting older. She examines the “many facets of the aging process, from purposes and challenges to struggles and surprises.” She breaks down the stigma and stereotypes about aging, forming beautiful turns of phrase such as this one: “The gift of these years is not merely being alive - it is the gift of becoming more fully alive than ever.” Joan Chittister is also an international speaker (some of her recent locations have included Ireland, Greenwich, and all over the United States), so there is a good chance you could see one of her talks. Click here to view her speaking schedule. 

You’re Only Old Once by Dr. Seuss

If you’re looking for something less serious, you can check out You’re Only Old Once: A Book for Obsolete Children by Dr. Seuss. This colorful and playful look on aging depicts many of Seuss’s visits to his own doctor in the later part of his life. The book focuses on the comical situation of the “poking and prodding and testing and ogling that go hand in hand with the dreaded appellation of ‘senior citizen.’” Readers are sure to feel just like a kid again, as anyone who loved Dr. Seuss in their youth will love this return to a classic author.

The Wonder of Aging: A New Approach to Embracing Life After Fifty by Michael Gurian

Whereas some of the previous books mentioned here focus on the spiritual side of aging,  this work by family therapist Michael Gurian also shines light on the more pragmatic benefits of getting older. For example, he shows how the “world needs our wisdom” and how becoming grandparents can be such a fulfilling experience, one that can only be achieved in your later years. He offers neuroscience research and anecdotes from his many clients over the years to examine aging as something more than just the body getting older; instead he presents a “holistic paradigm that embraces the soul-enriching opportunities of fifty and beyond,” as well as ways to apply that perspective to better our lives. 

Life Gets Better: The Unexpected Pleasures of Growing Older by Wendy Lustbader

 Seasoned gerontological social worker Wendy Lustbader wrote this book as a “counterbalance to the negative and stultifying stereotypes about aging that constrain everyone’s spirit.” Lustbader is aware of the challenges of aging, but she spends this book describing how the joys of youth are overrated, and that the psychological gains that come with getting older are all too often overlooked. She argues as you age you gain more things like freedom, wisdom, the ability to make better decisions, etc. Furthermore, just because older people may have challenges, doesn’t mean they don’t also have good moments too. Acts such as building new friendships and intimate relationships, maintaining sexual activity, and quitting alcohol and drugs - acts that most would assume is more often done by younger people - are all quite possible for older adults as well. 

Life does not stop as you age. It changes, definitely. But getting older is not a disease, nor is it a sign that you’re getting worse. As all these authors argue, getting older comes with some great benefits that only older adults get. Reading up on the work and research that these authors have put together is the first step in realizing what a fantastic stage in your life you’re in. Especially if you’re having trouble coping with aging, click on the book that most piques your interest and start to view aging in a whole new light.

— Avery Tamura