Figure out and share how to be memorialized

While it’s a heavy topic to consider, planning a memorial represents a great creative opportunity and a chance to give friends and loved ones something special to remember. (For help, here’s a list of suggestions on how to leave a lasting legacy, from arranging a family cookbook to hosting a “living funeral.”)

We’ve put together a worksheet for you to fill out for you or the person you’re planning for on how to be memorialized as well as body disposal options. Remember to share it with someone else so that they know the goals for you or the person you’re planning for. (Here is a PDF copy if preferred.)

While filling out the worksheet, we suggest that you or the person you’re planning for consider the following questions:

• What do you want to happen to your body when you die?

  • If burial:

    • Do you want a green burial?

    • Do you want an open casket with a viewing?

    • Do you want to be embalmed?

    • Do you want to be buried in a casket?

    • Do you want any particular final outfit?

  • If cremation: What do you want to happen to your ashes?

  • If donation: Where do you want your body donated?

• What do you want your funeral/memorial to be like?

  • Do you want a celebration of life, or traditional funeral?

  • Is there any special music you'd like played?

  • Are there any special foods you'd like served?

  • Are there any specific readings you'd like?

  • Is there a location where you'd like to have the service?

  • Any other special personal, family, cultural, or religious traditions you'd like to honor?

  • Is there anyone you'd like to invite (or not invite)?

  • Charity to ask for donations in lieu of flowers, if relevant

  • Anything else important to include?

• Memorials/monuments

  • Do you want anything special done in your memory (plant a tree, bench, etc.)?

  • If so, what would you like engraved on it?

  • If having a grave marker, what would you like written on it?

  • If having a grave marker, is there any specific style?

  • Do you want us to do something to honor you on the anniversary of your death?

• Social media

  • Do you want your Facebook deleted, turned into a memorial page, or left as is?

  • Do you want other social media (Instagram, LinkedIn, etc.) accounts to be deleted?

• Other ways to be remembered

  • Legacy Letter or Ethical Will: “a sort of road map of wishes ― to share beliefs, experiences, life lessons, even regrets, [with] family members who would outlive them” - Carrie Friedman

    • What do you want people to remember about you and integrate into their own lives?

    • What do you want your legacy to your community and your children to be after you’re gone?

The following links include information on the options available for what to do with a body: